Have you ever seen yourself in someone else? As in maybe a situation, or a trait of that person that totally reminds you of yourself? Well, lately I think I've been seeing a lot of that in my friend's friend. I haven't really met her yet but from the way my friend talks about her...It's just so me. I don't know if it's a common characteristic among ladies or it's just me. But I don't like what I see.
Maybe it's just the situation that made me feel that way. It doesn't mean that she's completely a bad person...but maybe it's because I'm seeing my friend suffer...I'm seeing him hurt...that's why I hate it and in the process I begin to question why I'm kind of like that too.
I concede. It's a known fact that men are from Mars and women are from Venus. But as I try to explain to my friend my side of the story...or why I think that his friend is acting in that manner, I realize that we are complicated. And I guess mostly it's because most women are very emotional. Since emotions can be influenced by so many factors, it becomes so complicated. So I guess that sometimes, we just can't help it. Not that I'm succumbing to nature...guess if we really wanted to change...we can.
11.20.2005
11.15.2005
Welcome to the Family
NYLES KEVIN was born today at around 0230. Seven pounds and eleven ounces, he's a strong, chubby little boy who's very lucky to have me as his aunt. Heh. Just kidding. Just imagining what it would be like with four little boys running around our house now. Yipes! Really can't wait to meet him. Tomorrow, I'm going to go get something for him...any suggestions?
11.13.2005
Just Slackin'
Five papers down, seven more to go. Somehow, I'm losing the urgency to study. Oh well, maybe it's because it's an afternoon paper tomorrow. Anyway, I'm kinda worried. I've been having trouble breathing these past few weeks...and I really don't know why. Hope it's nothing serious. Ok, I seriously need to get back to studying. I'll update as soon as I'm semi-free. :)
11.11.2005
Invictus
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.
-William Ernest Henley-
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.
-William Ernest Henley-
11.08.2005
Finding an Excuse Not to Study
Ok, I really really don't have the brains to study now...I think I lost it all during math today. It was good, but exhausting. Haha...But then, I don't really feel like sleeping yet because I'll feel so unproductive...So here's my excuse:
10 YEARS AGO I...
-went on an Eastern Mediterranean Cruise.
-was super scrawny.
-loved dancing so much.
-experienced the greatest tragedy in my life.
-was fond of our cat named Clovia and our dog named Mitsu.
5 YEARS AGO I...
-was part of a musical called "True Love Waits".
-was a part of Echoettes Young Voices.
-went on a Western Mediterranean Cruise and had a crush on one of the performers.
-was studying so hard to get my scholarship.
-was so sad because the sister closest to me got married.
1 YEAR AGO I...
-moved out of boarding school.
-experienced a snowy Christmas.
-had my heart broken for the first time.
-realized that singing is something I could do the rest of my life.
-felt like a princess thrown out of my castle.
YESTERDAY I...
-was excited that my exams are starting!
-studied in school the whole day.
-spent my day with numbers.
-learned how to play the first part of "I'd Give My Life for You".
-took a bus to Holland Village.
5 SNACKS I ENJOY...
-bread with butter and sugar.
-chocolates.
-waffle with ice cream.
-cereals.
-hmm...sun chips!
5 SONGS I KNOW ALL THE WORDS...
-All the songs from Miss Saigon!
-Angel in Disguise by Corrinne May
-Err...do christmas carols and choir songs count? (except gaelic blessing...i keep forgetting)
-Love Moves (in Mysterious Ways) by MYMP
-Tattooed on my Mind by D' Sound
5 THINGS I WOULD DO WITH A MILLION DOLLARS...
-buy a beach house.
-pay back my parents for all my nonesense.
-hmm...buy my ipod video! haha :)
-donate some to charity. :)
-can't think of anything more...maybe i'll save it!
5 PLACES I WOULD RUN AWAY TO...
-Sentosa Beach (yes I'd do that...)
-New York
-I'd want to go to the Colliseum again..
-Canada
-Santorini, Greece
5 THINGS I WOULD NEVER WEAR...
-anything with leather
-anything with fur
-anything velvet
-leggings
-hmmm what else??
5 FAVOURITE TV SHOWS...
-Alias
-Everwood
-Grey's Anatomy
-Desperate Housewives
-One Tree Hill
5 BAD HABITS...
-procrastinating
-pulling my hair
-not doing my laundry
-snoozing my alarm clock
-not finishing my food
5 BIGGEST JOYS...
-being with my nephews
-shopping
-singing...singing...singing....
-travelling
-oh have i mentioned shopping?
5 FICTIONAL CHARACTERS I WOULD DATE...
-Michael Vaughn...if he were still alive!
-I'm really loyal so I only have him on my list... :)
Ok, back to studying!
10 YEARS AGO I...
-went on an Eastern Mediterranean Cruise.
-was super scrawny.
-loved dancing so much.
-experienced the greatest tragedy in my life.
-was fond of our cat named Clovia and our dog named Mitsu.
5 YEARS AGO I...
-was part of a musical called "True Love Waits".
-was a part of Echoettes Young Voices.
-went on a Western Mediterranean Cruise and had a crush on one of the performers.
-was studying so hard to get my scholarship.
-was so sad because the sister closest to me got married.
1 YEAR AGO I...
-moved out of boarding school.
-experienced a snowy Christmas.
-had my heart broken for the first time.
-realized that singing is something I could do the rest of my life.
-felt like a princess thrown out of my castle.
YESTERDAY I...
-was excited that my exams are starting!
-studied in school the whole day.
-spent my day with numbers.
-learned how to play the first part of "I'd Give My Life for You".
-took a bus to Holland Village.
5 SNACKS I ENJOY...
-bread with butter and sugar.
-chocolates.
-waffle with ice cream.
-cereals.
-hmm...sun chips!
5 SONGS I KNOW ALL THE WORDS...
-All the songs from Miss Saigon!
-Angel in Disguise by Corrinne May
-Err...do christmas carols and choir songs count? (except gaelic blessing...i keep forgetting)
-Love Moves (in Mysterious Ways) by MYMP
-Tattooed on my Mind by D' Sound
5 THINGS I WOULD DO WITH A MILLION DOLLARS...
-buy a beach house.
-pay back my parents for all my nonesense.
-hmm...buy my ipod video! haha :)
-donate some to charity. :)
-can't think of anything more...maybe i'll save it!
5 PLACES I WOULD RUN AWAY TO...
-Sentosa Beach (yes I'd do that...)
-New York
-I'd want to go to the Colliseum again..
-Canada
-Santorini, Greece
5 THINGS I WOULD NEVER WEAR...
-anything with leather
-anything with fur
-anything velvet
-leggings
-hmmm what else??
5 FAVOURITE TV SHOWS...
-Alias
-Everwood
-Grey's Anatomy
-Desperate Housewives
-One Tree Hill
5 BAD HABITS...
-procrastinating
-pulling my hair
-not doing my laundry
-snoozing my alarm clock
-not finishing my food
5 BIGGEST JOYS...
-being with my nephews
-shopping
-singing...singing...singing....
-travelling
-oh have i mentioned shopping?
5 FICTIONAL CHARACTERS I WOULD DATE...
-Michael Vaughn...if he were still alive!
-I'm really loyal so I only have him on my list... :)
Ok, back to studying!
11.04.2005
My Little Darling
Daven turned 5 today. Gosh I can't believe how fast time flies...I remember how I used to feed him when he was just a few months old and now he's asking me to buy him Hot Wheels! Oh well, I really miss my little darling.. :) Counting the days 'til I go back home...
11.02.2005
I'm Only Human
It's been a really long time since I've spent time with the people closest to me- my family, my friends, my cousins...and it just scares me how I've changed and how much they don't know me anymore. Most of the time, I find myself frustrated with their reactions. Well, I've changed. It's not that I wanted to, it's just the way it is.
People often think of me as the person I was four years ago. I wouldn't blame them...those images were the last of me they'd ever seen. Of course they'll expect to see those right? But what they don't know are the things experiences I've gone through while I've been away. How these things have shaped who I am now and how these challenges have changed my perspective on life. I've talked to them about my day to day experiences but it's not that simple to understand.
Sometimes I ask myself, have I really changed for the better? Honestly, I don't know. All I know is that, I'm different in the sense that now, I feel more. No more I'm-the-king-of-the-world illusions. I'm only human. I make mistakes and I'm not as strong as you think I am. Now that I'm in this stage of my life when I really need your support, please don't shun me away and tell me that I can do it like I've done before. It kills me even more that you expect me to be who I was before when right now, I'm really struggling. Please hear me out.
People often think of me as the person I was four years ago. I wouldn't blame them...those images were the last of me they'd ever seen. Of course they'll expect to see those right? But what they don't know are the things experiences I've gone through while I've been away. How these things have shaped who I am now and how these challenges have changed my perspective on life. I've talked to them about my day to day experiences but it's not that simple to understand.
Sometimes I ask myself, have I really changed for the better? Honestly, I don't know. All I know is that, I'm different in the sense that now, I feel more. No more I'm-the-king-of-the-world illusions. I'm only human. I make mistakes and I'm not as strong as you think I am. Now that I'm in this stage of my life when I really need your support, please don't shun me away and tell me that I can do it like I've done before. It kills me even more that you expect me to be who I was before when right now, I'm really struggling. Please hear me out.
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