Just a Random Thought

I can't forget the one and only time I lost something. It was in Hong Kong. I fine day, I wanted to go to Daimaru to get those artsy stuff...kind of like squeezing this colored paint into a mold and they'll bake it for you to turn it into some form of glass art. But on the way, I realized that I had lost the money that my parents gave me for it. And ever since then, I've learned my lesson. I made it a point to take care of everything I had--to the point that when I'm taking a nap in the car or in the bus, I'd suddenly wake up feeling my pockets, making sure I had still had my wallet or phone.

But as I grew up, I realized that things change. Sometimes, the more you hold on to things, the more you lose them. Somehow, we just have this innate desire to obtain something that's not actually for us. I don't really know how to explain it but sometimes, at the back of my mind, I know it's not for me...but then, I'd still do everything I can for it...in hopes that maybe, I could derserve it too. Only to find that I'll still lose it eventually. And the more I chase after it...the more determined I am to obtain it, the harder it is to let go. Why can't I just settle for something I have or something that's been there for me all along... and learn to love it? Because when you realize that it's actually what you really needed...it's such an undesirable feeling to find that it's not there anymore.

So how does one let go? It's a question I've asked myself a million times. And yes, I'm still searching for answers.